Friday, May 20, 2022

Alien 2: On Earth (1980)... uhm... yeah...

Do I need to say anything? I mean it's obvious right? A bad Alien ripoff. A fake Italian sequel. It does have nudity in one scene and some odd kills but not nearly enough to make up for how insanely boring it is. Wait, is that an egg on the beach? Quick cut to someplace else. The FX are pretty bad even though they are practical. What sucks is how little FX you get and how everything else feels like filler for the worst cave movie you ever saw. Seriously, there is a monster in here killing people. They're trapped in a cave. How can you make it so dull? That takes a special kind of skill. No atmosphere, lifeless characters, nothing interesting going on, no sense of urgency or stakes, etc. I think my brain already expelled this dump out of self-preservation. So yeah, definitely skip this unless you just love suffering and even then there are about a billion better ways to toil in eternal pain although I guess boredom is one of the worst. But it's Alien 2... I had to watch it... please don't be as stupid as me...